Who like criticisms and failures? No one right? But whether we mistakenly do something or not, life is a journey of ups and downs. And sometimes, we have to receive blunt bad comments or experience epic failures to know exactly what we need to improve in ourselves. Yes, it’s emotionally painful depending on who throw it or how those happen. However, when you understand things objectively to handle your emotions, then it’s easier to face some bad trip moments.
Adapt Beginner’s Mind. As we conquer challenges and become achievers, we feel that we’re already skilled, experienced, and expert. It’s possibly true in our field or comfort zone, but things change when we try something different or go to a new territory. Practically, it’s good to expect that we’re not going be the best yet, but we will be soon. Thus we better adapt a beginner’s mind.
Ito problema nang mga nag-freelance, nagnegosyo, o lumipat ng trabaho e. Hindi kumo’t engineer, doctor, o ano mang propsesyon na mayroon ka, lahat ng iyon ay madadala mo sa bagong field na papasukin mo. Siyempre dapat naroon pa rin ang proud ka sa mga na-achieve mo kasi pinaghirapan mo naman talaga . Pero in terms of pride or ego, i-level mo rin kasi You can’t add something more in an already full container. Ika nga ni Zen Master Shunryu Suzuki, Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind: Informal Talks on Zen Meditation and Practice:
“In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few.”
How to have a beginner’s mind? According to Inc. Magazine ganire ang ilan:
- Kiyeme na lang ang common sense
- Durugin ang fear of failure
- Before you get answers, huwag mahihiyang magtanong kung may… (kinanta mo?)
- Isa-isa lang teh at koyah
Do the stoic approach. For me, if you justly apply stoicism in your money management, career or in your life; you’ll smoothly accept failures as part of your success. It lets you not to be impractical, but rather gritty to attain what you desire.
According to Philosophybasic.com, stoicism is an idea of Greek philosopher Zeno. It’s about attaining self-control and resilience to develop non-destructive emotions like being judgmental and make you free from suffering.
“The goal of Stoicism is freedom from passion (in the ancient sense of “anguish” or “suffering”) through the pursuit of reason and “apatheia” (apathy, in its ancient sense of being objective, unemotional and having clear judgment). It teaches indifference and a “passive” reaction to external events (on the grounds that nothing external could be either good or evil) and equanimity in the face of life’s highs and lows.”
Kung susumahin din kasi ay madalas tayo mismo ang gumagawa ng sarili nating multo at mga dahilan para mainis o magalit. Hinuhusgahan natin ang ibang tao agad kasi hindi sila naaayon sa pamantayan natin ng yaman, ganda, at talino. Kapag ang isang kasama sa work o negosyo ay may nagawa o nasabi na hindi pabor, parang ang sama n’ya na agad o walang puso. Bakit ganun? Kasi sa kaibuturan ng atin sarili nandoon ang emosyon na pagkamasarili at may kinikilingan (may pinoprotektahan… inulat mo rin?)
Practice Compartmentalization. Why multitasking is bad? Why work-life-balance is hard to achieve? It’s because of mixing up things that actually create mess. To compartmentalize is to separate things so you know what you need to think or feel at a particular moment. If you are free spirited rich prince or princess in your home, but in your company you’re a worker, then be a diligent professional follower at work. You cannot accept criticisms, even if those are helpful, if you feel or think you don’t deserve them because you are a princess. Sabi nga sa Wonder Woman di ba it’s not what you deserved, it’s what you believe.
|“Compartmentalization is a ‘divide and conquer’ process for separating thoughts that will conflict with one another. This may happen when they are different beliefs or even when there are conflicting values.” –changingminds.com|
Ang mahirap din kasi sa marami sa atin ay madalas na pagkukumpara sa ating nakalipas at sa ngayon, sa kung sino na tayo sa kung ano ba sila. Dinadala pa natin yung “excess baggage” na humalo sa naiisip at nararamdaman natin sa kasalukuyan. Hindi ba ang bawat tao na nakakasalubong natin sa buhay ay bahagi ng ating journey. At hindi sila nilikha na tulad natin para parati tayong purihin. Gayon din may mga bagay na hindi natin control pero kaya nating i-kontrol ang ating mga sarili– kung paano tayo magre-react, babangon, at babawi sa ating mga pagkakamali.